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Best Retirement Gifts for Your Male & Female Colleagues

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Do you have a colleague retiring soon? Here is our guide to the best funny, inexpensive, extravagant and heartfelt gifts to honor your co-worker.

Whether you are looking for a gag retirement gift for a best friend at work or a heartfelt “thank you” for years of service, we have the solution. Here is our guide to the best retirement gifts for your male and female colleagues.

Best Funny Retirement Gifts

Funny Gag Gift Mug

Give your coffee drinking retiree a ceramic mug to celebrate their new life. Personalized with sayings such as “I’m Done 2020” or “Goodbye Tension…Hello Pension”, each mug is 11 oz. and dishwasher safe. Custom-made within 2 days and comes packed in a gift box. Perfect for men and women. Starting at $13.87. stircrazygifts.com

The Official Retirement Papers

Your retiree deserves something rare – toilet paper! With The Official Retirement Papers”, they will not run out. Ready to ship within 1-2 business days. $8.99 per roll.
etsy.com

Journal – “Retirement! It’s like sleeping while you are awake. Well done!”

Give your retiree the gift of refection with this blank lined journal, perfect for doodling, dawdling or making a list of all the things they want to do in retirement. 110 pages with matte full-color softbound cover. The fun saying makes this the perfect gag gift as well. $7.50.
goodreads.com

Retirement Starter Kit

This humorous gift set includes an “officially retired” button, mini retirement checklist, retirement parking permit and a bottle of “Bi-Aggrah” candies. $14.99.
retirementpartysupplies.com

Best Retirement Gift for a Male Colleague

“Chummy Tee”

If you are looking for a more personal gag gift, look no further than a “Chummy” graphic t-shirt, hoodie or tank top. With cute sayings such as “The Legend Has Retired” or “I’m Retired – Every Day Is Saturday”, this gift is sure to elicit a chuckle. Comes in grey or white cotton. $23.95.
chummytees.com

Best Extravagant Retirement Gifts

A Handcut Crystal Bowl

This beautiful Revere bowl is mouthblown and handcut from 24% lead crystal by highly trained artists. Either standard or customized personalization is available. The bowl comes in a black box, perfect for gift giving. $149.
crystalplus.com

Master Class

If you are looking for something truly unique, Master Class offers over 85 video courses from the world’s most talented instructors. Your retiree can learn tennis from Serena Williams, cooking from Wolfgang Puck or the fine art of taking pictures from acclaimed Rolling Stone magazine photographer Annie Leibowitz. $180 year or $15 per month subscription.
masterclass.com

Explorers Captain’s Clock

Give your retiree the gift of time with this elegant desktop clock. Featuring golden Roman numerals on a white clock face, with golden minute and second hands in a polished mahogany-rosewood box. $222.
netique.com

Best Retirement Gift for a Male Colleague

A “Golfer’s Bro-Basket”

What better gift to give a male golfer than this custom “Bro-Basket” filled with everything he could ask for. The reusable case contains a golf towel with bag clip, golf tee holder, a dozen plastic tees, a three-pack of Calloway™ balls, DivPro™ golf tool, three Nicaraguan cigars and leather cigar case and cutter, beef jerky and other snacks. To top it all off, your colleague can enjoy a bottle of Johnny Walker Black Label scotch with a personalized message on the bottle. $204.95.
thebrobasket.com

Best Retirement Gift for Female Colleague

A Spa Gift Basket

Your female retiree can pamper herself with a gift basket filled with goodies. This package includes a Loofah Spa Gift Set, Gardenia Bouquet body lotion and soap, cucumber facemask, hot /cold eye gel mask, wooden handle bath brush, satin rose pedals, Lindor Truffles, Primo Dolce Truffle Cookies and more. She can take a spa getaway without leaving home! $112.95.
designityourselfgiftbaskets.com

Best Inexpensive Retirement Gifts

On the other hand, if your wallet does not allow you to go all out, here are some more inexpensive gift ideas for you colleague.

“Retirement Survival Kit”

A fun all-in-one novelty gift and card. This “kit” includes a balloon – “to start your year off with a bang”, a battery – “to give you energy to do it all”, a “Happy Retire-MINT” and more. Packaged in an organza bag with personalized label, this is a great alternative to a greeting card. $7.05. bonanza.com

RETARED 2020 Mask

Give the gift that is inexpensive and practical – a mask! This fun, non-medical grade mask is perfect for those times that your retiree needs to “mask-up” while out in public. Great for commemorating retirement and 2020. $10.
teepublic.com

100 Things to Do Scratch Off Poster

With more time on their hands, your retiring colleague will need some bucket list ideas. This poster dares your recipient to “make an art out of trying new things” such as swimming in a waterfall, running a marathon or making an origami animal. Come in a tube, coin for scratching off items not included. $15.
uncommongoods.com

Best DIY Retirement Gift

A Poster!

If you want to give something handmade without actually making anything, this poster is perfect! The site asks you to pick a color scheme, type a ten to twenty line message, download your poster and print at home. Buy a frame from the Dollar Store or Dollar General and voila – a gift that is personal and inexpensive for your retiree! $14.70.
Homemade-gifts-made-easy.com

Best “Thank You” Retirement Gifts

These gifts are a perfect way to give a heartfelt “thank you” to a male or female colleague.

Round Crystal Award

Constructed from beautiful optic crystal, this memento is the perfect way to express appreciation to a departing co-worker. Personalize with retiree name, title, years of service and four-line message. Measures 4.25” x .75” x 4” and packaged in a black gift box. $49.99.
personalizationmall.com

Thank You Gift Tower

Treat your retiree to this gift “tower” filled with goodies. Each crate contains five Royal Vernao™ pears, two seasonal apples, mixed nuts [cashews, almonds, walnuts, and pecans], three-seed crackers and pepper-onion relish.
Add a big “Thank You” ribbon and you have the perfect way to say thanks. Ships in 2 days. $74.99.
harryanddavid.com

Hardcover “Happy Retirement” Guest Book

This 70 lined-page memory book is perfect for colleagues to share their well wishes and memories. 8 ½” x 8 ½” Hardcover. $25.16. walmart.com

Retirement Wishes Personalized Canvas Print

Professionally produced on an actual artist’s canvas with archival ink, this 20 x 30 print features all the important moments and mementos from the retiree’s career. Choose from three different color options and personalize it with a title, retiree’s name, years of service and up to six-line message. $44.99. personalizationmall.com